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Red stars were added through sophisticated digital image editing software to indicate best lap and race.
The following message was left by “The Challenger” on my Guestbook:
Yo, I just beat one of your Mario Kart Records. I won’t tell you which one, but I’m coming for you =) D.K. Jr. all the way.
Confident and shrouded in secrecy, The Challenger did reveal one pitfall in his approach to Super Mario Kart: an unwavering devotion to Donkey Kong Jr. Absurdity. Anyone who knows anything about Super Mario Kart for SNES knows that Bowser is a far superior character. Perhaps a series of coincidental performances convinced The Challenger to develop this Donkey Kong Jr. superstition. Perhaps The Challenger was just having a good day. Perhaps The Challenger is part ape himself. Perhaps The Challenger does not believe in dinasaurs and thus finds a dinasaur capable of driving to be completely ridiculous. I cannot be certain.
Whatever his reasonining, I can assure you that Bowser is a far superior Super Mario Kart racer for the SNES–better top speed, better turning, better acceleration. And, I, putting forth even half my full effort, am a far better driver than any challenger. This has been proven.
I accept The Challenger’s challenge, and unlike Marcus from Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, I am up to the challenge.
How many questions could be tied to such astronomically disproportionate dollar amounts? Who is assigning these values? Do they change with inflation, and if so, why are they always rounded so cleanly? Does anyone ever get the money for providing a correct answer to the question? Is there any kind of royalty system in place for the individual who originally posed the question? Why is the dollar amount never provided by the same person who poses the question? How will the government’s “bailout plan” affect the value of the question? So many questions, so few answers.
To satisfy my curiosity, I did a little Internets “research”, and it appears that most “historians” agree that the question derives from two semi-popular-ish TV shows from the 1950’s, The $64 Question and The $64,000 Question. In the 1970s, the concept would be revived as The $128,000 Question, which aired for two seasons before going the way of the Dodo. Ironically, the so-called “$128,000 Question” didn’t even exist–contestants who won the $64,000 prize at the end of their show would return at the season finale to compete for an additional $64,000.
So, that’s resolved.
* Oldhab Quote of the Day: “My fantasy football team did horrible today, but at least Cinco Uno had 11 points.”
While federal policymakers work to resolve our nation’s economic crisis, I have refocused all of my attention toward my quest to achieve world domination in Super Mario Kart. This time, I bring you eight new best race and best lap World Records. Click HERE to view the *official* TwinGalaxies.com press release announcing my accomplishments and HERE to visit my TwinGalaxies.com player profile, where you can view all of my records, including these most recent additions:
Bowser Castle 1
–Race – 1:37.06
–Lap – 18.95
Bowser Castle 2
–Race – 1:50.83
–Lap – 21.79
Ghost Valley 1
–Race – 1:07.57
–Lap – 13.40
Ghost Valley 2
–Race – 1:05.07
–Lap – 12.93
Ghost Valley 3
–Race – 1:27.48
–Lap – 17.38
Mario Circuit 1
–Race – 1:01.17
–Lap – 12.12
Mario Circuit 3
–Race – 1:40.56
–Lap – 19.53
Rainbow Road
–Race – 1:31.25
–Lap – 18.08
Buh.
One of my Christmas gifts was Balderdash, the self-proclaimed “Hilarious Bluffing Game” that you might remember from dozens of nights with Jasonand Brandon during our youth. While some of our classic definitions will be posted in the future, this journal entry will only detail the humorous contributions from our most recent Balderdash game. You see, the *new* Balderdash includes four new categories–movies, people, laws, and abbreviations–in addition to the usual list of obscure words. On Saturday, Ashwini, Brandon, Javan, Jen C, Jenny G, Pejman and his two cousins Sal (aka The Fatty’s) and Sarah, Richard, Vivian, and I all gathered at Javan’s new house for a fun-filled, though highly competitive holiday contest. Below I’ve listed what I consider to be some of the funniest moments during the game.
Movies
Six Lessons from Madame LaZonga:- A 1967 drama involving a young French maiden and a chimney sweeper. (Javan)
- Madame LaZonga runs a finishing school for unruly girls in 1920’s America. (Vivian)
- A young woman attends boarding school and learns she is heir to the throne. (Brandon)
- The story of a man that became a legend when he became a bear. (John)Buford’s Beach Bunnies:
- Harry Buford got rich selling barbecued rabbit sandwiches and now wants to leave the business to his son. (correct)
- An animated film of rabbits that escape from the farm to find themselves on an enchanted beach. (Jen C.)
Definitions
trichobezoar:
- A gesture that also performs magic tricks. (Jenny G.)
Laws
In the outback of New Zealand, it is still illegal to light…
…wood. (Pejman)
…fires on an animals back. (Bun)
…one’s pipe from the fire of the chief. (correct)
People
Lita Nahas:
- Discovering her sexuality at a young age with her wheelchair-bound half-brother half-orc…brother, she went on to develop a method of colon cleansing that minimized anal irritation. (Bun)
- a Mexican/Greek goddess. (Richard)
Abbreviations
I.O.O.F:International Opposition to Old Fortresses (Jenny G.)
Inland Ohio’s Opera Foundation (Jen C.)
I Onced “Oopsed” For three hours. (Bun)
International Organization of Obsolete FrenchmanI.F.S.B:
International Flatulent Shark Beaters (Richard)
Indian Freedom Salt Bath (Sal)
I hadn’t played Balderdash for a couple of years, so it was particularly satisfying that I dominated every aspect of the game and won in glorious fashion. In fact, Saturday marked the first time in my entire life that I actually knew a definition (for the word “glabrescent”, meaning “without hair”). As always, it was great seeing everyone together, and it was a clear reminder of why we’ve remained close throughout college and beyond.
* Go Figure of the Day: The MS Word spellchecker didn’t recognize “trichobezoar” as a word.
* Movie Quote of the Day: “She likes music.”
