2008 November | JohnOhab.com

Archive | November, 2008

The Cardinals soaked up Philly like a sponge!

November 29, 2008

After Thursday’s debacle against the Eagles, I’m starting to wonder if this Jack in the Box commercial is the only resource used by the Cardinals scout team.

Five dollar Mimefest!

November 28, 2008

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The only redeeming aspect of the Arizona Cardinals’ embarrassing performance against the Philadelphia Eagles: the Philly cheeseteaks at Subways in Philadelphia taste much better than they do in Arizona.

Saved by the Bell Nurse Resurrected

November 26, 2008

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Saved by the Bell nurse sans nurse outfit Every Saved by the Bell episode contains several scenes so incredibly awkward that their viewing should be uniformly banned except as punishment for violent crime. Recently, I was reminded of one particularly awkward episode when I spotted the above actress, Nancy Valen, hosting an informercial for the [...]

A Neurosigntist’s Point of View: DC Metro Trash

November 25, 2008

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“Is that your bag…and your severed and minced hands, right arm, feet, and hair?” Perhaps this is why the Metro lady so adamantly suggests we step back as the metro doors are closing.

20 Reasons You Shouldn’t Say "W00t"

November 24, 2008

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It’s annoying. It’s annoying. It’s annoying. It’s annoying. It’s annoying. It’s annoying. It’s annoying. It’s annoying. It’s annoying. It’s annoying. It’s annoying. It’s annoying. It’s annoying. It’s annoying. It’s annoying. It’s annoying. It’s annoying. It’s annoying. It’s annoying. It’s annoying.

Footlong beards are so two millennia ago

November 23, 2008

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\ The Library of Congress is perhaps the most beautiful building in Washington DC, and it provides unquestionably the most opportunities (1) for forced public mimicry of nude, unrealistically muscular old men in strange acquatic settings. After performing your mime of choice, you should proceed directly to the Exploring the Early Americas exhibit, which [...]

Wednesday’s Celebrity Double on Saturday

November 22, 2008

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A new celebrity double has been added for Jackie, left, and actress Christina Ricci. Spread the word. This exciting news might get lost in the shuffle with all Obama cabinet speculation. You can check out the rest of my celebrity doubles by clicking HERE.

SkyMall Fest 2008: Are you done Yeti?

November 21, 2008

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With its redundantly redundant name and characteristically big feet, the Big Foot the Garden Yeti sculpture serves absolutely no pragmatic purpose other than to remind me of my favorite Jack Link’s Messin’ with Sasquatch commercial, “Cold One”. There is something endlessly amusing about the disparity between Sasquatch’s facial expression before and after he gets blasted [...]

A Neurosigntist’s Point of View: Addressing Our Nation’s Beheaded Jester Problem

November 21, 2008

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As we all know, Washington DC is among the slipperiest cities in the nation. According to a study by the Department of Homeland Security, slippings have increased ten-fold over the past decade, a trend that may account for the recent surge in beheaded medieval court jesters found throughout the nation’s capital. In addition, the accessories [...]