I received a very disturbing email from Dave L. last week and could barely muster enough strength to speak about the injustice he described. Apparently, some random website called “Tastes Like Chicken” (http://www.tlchicken.com/%29 has begun advertising themselves as “The Best Damn Website in the Universe”, a clear infringement of JohnOhab.com’s status as The Greatest and Best Website in the World. Who are these individuals who “taste like chicken”? Do they understand the implications of their negligence?
How can they claim to have the best website in the universe, when everybody knows that our parent site, JohnOhab.com, is already the best website in the world? I mean, really, they aren’t even the best website on this planet, let alone our solar system, yet they are making claims about the universe? That doesn’t even make sense. Maybe in some parallel dimension where naming a website “Tastes Like Chicken” is considered mildly amusing, but that senseless hullabaloo doesn’t fly here. Even at the most basic level, JohnOhab.com is the Greatest AND Best website in the world. Not only do I win on the sheer absurdity of their claims, but I also win the outright adjective competition. Greatest + Best = two adjectives, which, if my math is correct, is nearly two times more than just one adjective (“Best”). Yeah, that’s right, nobody here is falling for the use of expletives like “damn” to increase your adjective count. That’s below the belt and wouldn’t even be taken into consideration by any respectable judging committee.
* The Next Logical Question of the Day: Dave apparently came across this site during a web search. What search term led to Dave finding a website called “Tastes Like Chicken”?
November 26, 2005
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